


Lullaby

by Ratha_FireSong



Category: The Hobbit (2012)
Genre: Deep in the Meadow, M/M, Ratha_FireSong Fic, lullaby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-27
Updated: 2012-12-27
Packaged: 2017-11-22 16:15:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/611744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ratha_FireSong/pseuds/Ratha_FireSong
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At the end of the Battle of Five Armies, Bilbo must face the hardest thing in his life he has ever known.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Deep In the Meadow

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was something I thought about for a long time. It was very hard to write while crying myself but so worth it in the end. 
> 
> The song is Rue's Lullaby (Deep in the Meadow) from the Hunger Games and I though it very fitting for the fic.

The battle of the five armies ended and Bilbo was called from his spot upon the hill. He knew that he would have been in the way and Thorin, his lover, had ordered him to stay out in fear that he couldn’t protect him as the battle raged on around them. There was news that a few from their company had been slain in the battle and the hobbit chewed on his bottom lip thinking about each face of his Dwarvin friends. Each one of them had a place in his heart now and to know that their lives were snuffed out brought him great sadness. They had cared for him on the adventure and he would never forget their faces.

His frantic gaze looked over the battle field as he witnessed firsthand the destruction of war. Orcs, Elves, Men and Dwarves lay in piles on the grass soaked with each other’s blood. The fires dotted the landscape for the enemy’s carcasses to be thrown upon to try to burn their existence from this beautiful land. The hobbit trembled as he laid his eyes upon the first of the company who had survived the battle limp up to him, their faces drawn in sorrow.

Balin ran up as quick as he could to clutch onto Bilbo’s small form and held him for a time until the feeling of sadness had passed. “I am so glad you didn’t fall, little thief.” He muttered in his shoulder before pulling away.

“It is alright. Thorin told me I should wait for him after the battle is done.” Bilbo chuckled a bit. “Confident oaf. I bet he got bandages on his pride as well as his body.”

When the hobbit said the king’s name, Balin’s face changed. His expression was blank and his eyes seemed to be far away from this moment. It caused Bilbo to stop his laughing to really stare at his friend.

“What happened…?” He whispered softly.

“As you know…a few of our company has fallen to the Orcs. Fili and Kili are no more.” Bilbo’s eyes watered and his hands clutched his chest thinking about the young Dwarves. “But there is graver news then this.”

“W-What news? I don’t understand.” Bilbo tried not to think about Thorin, but the images wouldn’t stop coming into his mind. He looked about for the king in the crowds of men and Dwarves. “Thorin! Where is he? I need to know where he is. That prideful king! If he is hiding…if-“

His friend’s hand lay upon his shoulder, clutching it out of comfort. No it couldn’t be. It just couldn’t happen. Bilbo’s eyes closed tightly and he smacked Balin’s hand away from him so his arms could clutch about himself. Thorin Oakenshield was strong! He was the best fighter in the company! He couldn’t have fallen to these rabble of Orcs!

“He has called you to…his tent before he passes to the halls of his father’s. He wants to see you one last time; he will not see anyone else.” The Dwarf whispered gently and gestured for Bilbo to follow him.

The walk to Thorin’s tent was the hardest that Bilbo had ever taken. Each foot fall grew heavier and painful as he neared the large tent, the king’s banner flew in the soft wind and the survivors of the company stood outside with Gandalf. The old wizard looked upon the hobbit and his eyes sadden for what was to come would break the poor Halfling into two.

“Bilbo…” Gandalf opened the flap of the tent for him to walk through. “I’m sorry.”

Bilbo looked back at the company that he had held so dearly in his heart before disappearing inside. Thorin lay on a bed of furs stripped down to his undershirt and a blanket laid upon his chest. There were bandages wrapped around his arms and chest in an effort to stop the bleeding, but the red strains signaled that the wounds were too great. The hobbit’s heart was breaking as he stayed there watching him, watched how his breath was shallow and painful with each inhale.

“My love.” Thorin gasped out softly and lifted his hand out to the Halfling that he had taken upon as his companion.

It only took three steps before Bilbo was at his lover’s side clutching onto his hand tenderly. Tears leapt from his eyes and managed to drip down onto Thorin’s battle scared knuckles. They stayed silent just enjoying each other’s presence in this world before they would be parted forever. Bilbo couldn’t help but let out a few choked sobs as grief started to slowly take hold of him. Their dreams of a life together was falling apart before his eyes and his greatest and only love would be soon gone from this world leaving him behind in darkness to walk upon Middle Earth in sorrow.

“Please no tears Bilbo.” Thorin finally spoke up and smiled weakly up at the Halfling. “I do not want to leave this world seeing your face full of sadness and tears.”

The king’s hand slowly moved up to cup his lover’s cheek trying to dry his tears that did not seem to stop. Thorin smiled more thinking that Bilbo was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Even the stone he had been coveting most of his life was nothing compared to the hobbit’s face.

“Thorin…I-I can’t do this on my own. I can’t go back to Bag End without you…” Bilbo sobbed softly burying his face into the king’s hand. He tried his best to not cry but this was too much for his heart to bare. “I can’t live without you…”

“Yes you can Bilbo…you can because…you are stronger then you seem…” His breathing was becoming shallower by the moment as he spoke. He knew that there wasn’t much time as he felt the pull of the other world upon him. “Please…my love…I want to hear you sing again…please sing to me a song about your home…do this for me…”

How could he sing now, but the hobbit nodded sadly to his lover and crawled into the bed with him. Thorin’s large head lay upon his chest as he held him close, his hand stroking the lines in his face as he tried to remember a song to sing for his lover. There were no songs of his people for great kings or for dark times such as these. There was one his mother sang to him as a lullaby and with all his might, he lifted his voice to his fallen king and started to sing.

_“Deep in the meadow_

_Under the willow_

_A bed of grass_

_A soft green pillow._

_Lay down your head_

_And close your sleepy eyes_

_And when again they open_

_The sun will rise._

_Here it’s safe_

_And here it’s warm._

_Here the daisies guard you_

_From every harm._

_Here your dreams are sweet_

_And tomorrow brings them true._

_Here is the place…”_

Bilbo’s voice cracked when he looked down to see Thorin one last time, but his eyes were closed and his breath had left his body. He was gone and the hobbit was there clutching his still warm body against his own. His heart cried out, it cried out with an emotion he had never felt before in his life. It was cold and painful like the sting of a sword. It was like venom that slowly seeped into his blood, killing him even though he was still alive. But he must finish the song, the king, his dearest and only love commanded him to do so.

_“Here is the place_

_Where I love you…”_


	2. Under the Willow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bilbo had lived his long life alone thinking about his fallen king but now he would have to spend eternity in the Grey Havens alone. Or…will he find something to ease his heart?

The ship sailed into the fog and the small bands of travelers were soon enveloped by its white smoke. The few Elves on the ship sat together with Gandalf and Frodo while Bilbo stood at the front looking out at the utter bright mist about them. He had lived a very long life, but for some reason he felt much older than the Elves on the ship. A long life of loneness he had lived, although the company of his nephew was greatly welcomed. His thoughts soon turned to his first grand adventure he had taken with Gandalf and the Dwarven Company and how much be missed the sight of the Lonely Mountain. The hobbit’s heart jolted in pain and he clenched his shirt gently thinking about the king he had loved so many years ago.

Thorin Oakenshield. A name that caused the worst pain and the name he longed to whisper to himself in the dark but dared not to. Frodo did not know most of the story of his king lover and himself since no matter how many years separated himself from that moment of his death, he could not bear to speak of the happy times they had together. Oh how he wished he had died with Thorin that day, but the Dwarf king would had beaten him into the world of the living being the stubborn king he was. But did he understand how Bilbo wished to be with him again? How at night he would clutch onto the Mithril mail shirt that he had given to him? How his only desire in life was to be in his arms again?

Bilbo looked down at the glittering water and his eyes widen. What use to be grey hair was no replaced by his dirty blond locks of his youth and his wrinkled face was now smooth with no sign of his previous age when he left on the docks. He turned back to his traveling companions to find Gandalf has also regressed to a younger man and Frodo did not look so tired and worn as before.

“What is this magic?” The older hobbit whispered.

“This is the magic of our lands.” Galadriel said as he approached him as if gliding on ice. “In this land there is no time and no aging. You come to these lands in the prime of your youth when you felt the most happiness.”

The most happiness was when I was with Thorin, Bilbo thought sadly and turned his head away.

The fog slowly started to recede from around the ship and the first sight of the Grey Haven was the large mountains crowned with green. It was a breath taking land of life and Bilbo could hear music and voices singing with no words. This was the land of the Ever Young. Pain and mortality was just a dream, but the hobbit still felt the sting in his heart. He could see that his friends and nephew felt their burdens ease, but only he was left alone to hold onto his own burden. Losing one’s soul mate was a hard thing and to know he would live for eternity without the hope to see Thorin in death was almost too much. He regretted climbing aboard the ship now.

Once the ship docked they were greeted by Elves and beings of glorious light, but Bilbo did not stay to speak with them like Gandalf and Frodo. His feet were taking him somewhere and he had to follow them. The grass was soft and his body felt light, but there was heaviness in his heart. Around him the trees sparkled with silver in their leaves as the wind blew. Such a land would bring peace to anyone and slowly it did for Bilbo.

There was a large willow free crowned with silver flowers and it strangely reminded him of the one he played under as a young hobbit child. His slender fingers touched over the bark and felt the pulse of life that would never die; the same life that he felt when he first touched Thorin. The tears rolled down his cheeks but he had nothing left in him to cry out. He just stood there with his hand on the tree with silent tears streaming from his eyes.

“You would have liked it here Thorin.” Bilbo spoke to the tree. “It would have brought you peace since you longed for a home of your own.”

_“Home is where you are Bilbo.” Thorin whispered into his lover’s ear._

Bilbo cried out and fell to his knees in front of the tree holding himself tightly. “You were my home too Thorin! Bag End never felt like home when I came back after you died! Home was in your arms!”

The hobbit laid his forehead against the willow trembling in pain until his crying subsided. He felt nothing but emptiness knowing that he would truly never be home without Thorin. It was then a voice sounded behind Bilbo. It was low and full of power, but the one thing that made him hold his breath was it was a voice he had heard a long time ago.

_“Forget your woes_

_And let your troubles lay._

_And when again it’s morning_

_They will all wash away._

_Here your dreams are sweet_

_And tomorrow brings them true._

_Here is the place_

_Where I love you.”_

Turning quickly, Bilbo stood up and his eyes locked with those blue eyes he had seen in his dreams for as long as he could remember. Thorin stood tall with Mithril crown upon his dark head. He looked as Bilbo remembered such a long time ago, smiling at his lover with a heart full of love. The hobbit didn’t know his feet were moving until he was in the safety of the Dwarf’s arms around him. It was coming home after being on a long journey and his heart was so full in that moment that he didn’t know what else to do but cry.

“I told you, little thief, that you were strong enough to go on without me.” Thorin whispered into the crown of Bilbo’s golden hair. “It was only for a little while, because now we will never know what it is like to be without each other.”

“Thorin!” Bilbo cried out through his tears of joy. “Oh Thorin! I love you so much!”

Their lips locked together as they held each other tightly never wanting to let the other go. For so long they had waited to be together again and now that it was coming true. Thorin and Bilbo would live forever in each other’s arms; in the rightful home that they had been without for so long.


End file.
